51.

Do you know what it feels like, trying so mofo hard but still failing? Nope, you don’t. All of you don’t know how it feels like. All far too self-centered and egoistic to concern yourselves with your supposedly “friends”. So I’ll tell you then. You feel crushed. Like the whole world is crashing down. You feel demoralized like wtf have I been working so hard for? you feel dead, empty like you’re just an empty shell. You feel like crying but the tears won’t flow. You hate the whole because no on actually really cares (enough) to bother. This is actually an understatement. Words can’t describe it. You’ve got to experience it for yourself then you’ll understand. But heh, I doubt all of you ever will. How can you, when all you ever care about is you, your grades, your feelings, your stuff blah blah? Everything has to be all about you doesn’t it. How will you all ever understand it when all of you are so frickin’ competitive, you lose yourselves in this “race” and you forget about your “friends”? You compete so hard just to place first and hurt your “friends” in the process. But who cares right? All you want is first place. Who gives a fuck about the ones who need help right?
Sure I’m wallowing in self-pity. Sure I’m incompetent. Doesn’t matter to all of you “clever people” anyway right. Fuck all of you. Really.

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