It’s just a bad day, it’s just a bad day

Had the shittiest day ever today, probably compounded by the sever lack of sleep bc I slept at 3am. But god, I have never wanted choir to be over this bad. I can’t wait for 12th May, when concert is finally over and I can just go full out studying. It is so so so exhausting to reach home at 9pm every single day so drained by choir and the responsibilities I have to fulfill. I’m sorry I am not quite capable of dealing with that much responsibilities and you know my threshold for stress is very very low.
Choir concert prep is making me very very stressed, my studies are shit my grades are crap, and then there’s you, and my brain, overthinking and overflowing with thoughts that drown me. It’s so noisy up here in my mind I wish I could just shut it down. I don’t want to feel like this anymore. I don’t want to feel like I’m never good enough, never competent enough, never important enough. I hate this all. I just want to disappear. I just want to die and cry. Hate that I’m simply not good enough for anyone or anything. Just not worth the effort right?

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